Meanwhile in Texas . . .

This has to be the dumbest crime in the history of dumb crimes . . . like, totally giving a literal meaning to the term petty theft.

This dude in Austin, Texas — named Ervin Johnson (no, not that one) — was super bummed out his ex-girlfriend went to Burger King with another guy.

What made the whole thing worse . . . that other guy totally bought Ervin’s ex’s meal.

The nerve!

Ervin was NOT having THAT so dude hid in the bushes outside his ex’s apartment . . . and when she came walking up with the bag of BK . . . he STOLE IT!

Dude totally popped out of the bushes, grabbed the Burger King bag and made a run for it.

The ex called the police . . . authorities caught up with Ervin, and charged him with theft.

Goes to show, you can’t always “have it your way.”